Not sure when it happened, probably in between the cupcakes and bread, and more bread, and then the chips and oreos...but no matter when it happened, it did. I have no motivation to track what I am eating and hold myself accountable for what I eat during the day.
I am envious of the people who don't need to account for every single morsel that goes into their bodies, and I am irritated with my own self that I have gotten to this point where I HAVE to be accountable for every morsel or I gain weight. I am back up. 225.5. And I know how hard I was working, and how I am not working that hard anymore, and I know what has to right itself. I just don't know how to start in order to get back to feeling successful again.
The weather isn't helping, and being unemployed isn't helping. I haven't been reading blogs as much because it is frustrating to see what I am not doing and could be doing and feeling.
I know I will find a way out of the funk. It's taking a toll, and maybe I am keeping good things away from myself because of the negative/sad/down energy that surrounds me.
I miss having a job. I miss being useful. I miss our housekeeper. I miss city life.
I am going to get out of this. Really.